Birth, Life, Death and Rebirth flash before my eyes, faster, and faster. The kindling of the flame, the burning of the great fire, the black smoke and the smouldering coal – I live through them. I am the spark that first set my world aflame and I breathe to see that Great suffering through, to the end.

And how sweet the promise of the final struggle, knuckles turned white, and the shrugged shoulders, a head hammered, the heaving chest, and the bleeding heart – how sweet to hear the dead last screams of Kali Yuga… end, at last. And I know that I will get to see and live the Dark descent, when the last Great chapter closes, and I need not see light reborn to rise and feast.

I was not spared the bitter cup. It has made my face stone-cold, sculpted from the side of a mountain, and my eyes stare deeply, undisturbed, born of water. I have learned to live under the weight of the world. When all is taken away. Cold freedom. The taste of loss.

Reality is washed away, slowly. A part of me erodes, fading, a journey to the past – a land governed by foreign law. Some truth – forgotten, I cannot remember. Someone who I used to be – now dead. Nothing but smoke in the wind, obscuring the great Sun from view – only from a moment.

Then – Light.

Sweet Light. Bliss. I carry it around my neck. At times it is heavily distant, unreachable, impossible. Then I taste and I say: “Ah! That is what I was after.”

I know the Bliss to be real.

One day

even I

will reach it.

09.09.2020